It's been a while... again...

Goodness, gracious, great balls of... Me!

Ok, ok, I know it's been a while since I've taken the opportunity to enrich your meager lives with the wit and charm you've come to know, expect and love. But, in my defense, I've, uh, been really busy...?

Anyway, I don't really have anything new or exciting to discuss. The most interesting thing that's happened around here lately is we got rid of Moose, our half Saint Bernard, half bloodhound puppy. I say "puppy" because he's only a little over a year old and has the attention span of a goldfish. Now, imagine a 120 pound goldfish with a tail like a baseball bat, and you really get the idear. Good dog - but a little dumb... and clumsy... and a digger... and a barker...

But enough about the dog. Let's talk about me some more.

Just watched another FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC episode of So You Think You Can Dance! We're down to the final four and next week is the finale. It's kind of bittersweet for me because I'm really looking forward to the finale and I'm dying to see who's going to win, but on the other hand I don't want to see the season end - oh, what's a girl to do??

I don't want to gay it up too much, but there was one routine that nearly pushed me over to the other side. I won't go into specifics, so suffice to say it was hit or miss there for a few minutes. I had to go wake the wife up and verify my hetero-ness. I just wish I could have done it without Joshua's image in my mind...

But I digress. Work is going pretty well, although there was a rumor of layoffs floating around. Ok, I admit, I was pretty much orchestrating the rumor. Even so, it was pretty interesting. I guess I overdid it a bit because a couple people got scared and told their manager about the rumor I was bandying about, so I got called into a meeting with one of the managers to set my mind at ease. I told him I wasn't worried on account of my being such a genius computer nerd, but he basically asked me to knock it the hell off with the rumor-mongoring, and such. He didn't come right out and chastise me directly, but I got his point readily enough. ;-) Ain't I a stinker?

Suzanne got a new hobby recently - skeet shooting. In fact, she went right out and bought herself a brand new 12-gauge over/under shotgun. Fortunately, money's a little tight these day - but that didn't worry her one little bit. And even though I suggested that she wait to see if she really wants to commit to this hobby, she was brave enough to not let it slow her down at all. She even poo-poo'd my advice that she buy a pump-action shotgun, rather than an over/under, so that it would be of more use if she was out on a trail ride and was attacked by a puma, or a bear, or something. My thinking is, the more shells you can fire off, the more likely you might actually hit something. Her thinking is... well, she doesn't bother with any of that, she just likes the look of the over/under better. That's why I love her... ??

And finally, the boys are both signed up for football this year. Chase was a little small last year with his long skinny bones and whatnot. This year he's actually taller and thinner, if that's even possible, but he'll be one of the older, if not bigger, players. Also, a couple of his buddies are going to be playing.

Chris is up to nearly 5 feet and a little over 100 pounds, so he'll be among the bigger kids on the team, but still not so heavy that he can't play one of the "back" positions. The cutoff is 110 pounds to play quarterback, or running back, etc. Otherwise, it's on the line, Fatty. Sadly, he has little to no quarterback or running back skills, so it's kind of immaterial at this point.

I can't really coach both teams, so I've decided to coach Chase's team since last year I coached Chris's team. Not to mention I like Chase WAY better than Chris. Of the boys, he's my favorite. Kayla's still my favorite girl, of course, and indeed my favorite, overall. So, it goes like this: Kayla, Chase, Stephanie, then Chris. I was really pulling for Stephanie to nudge up into second place, but that darn Chase is just so cute, I couldn't bring myself to cut him.

Ok, I know I'm not supposed to have favorites, but it's not like they're ever gonna read this blog and find out the horrible truth. It's the perfect crime!

On the other hand, Stephanie IS working to be a doctor one day, which means that she might actually be able to support me in my dotage, so I might want to reconsider my rankings. But, no matter how you slice it, Chris is definitely last! That poor kind don't got a chance! Then again, he's going to be bigger than me in about a year and a half, so by the time he's 18, he'll probably be able to bend me into a bloody pretzel, so I might have to move him up by the time it occurs to him to look into the standings.

Ok, so for now, it's Kayla, Chase, Steph then Chris. But, "officially", it's Stephanie (for the money), Chris (because he might hurt me one day), Kayla (because she's in the military and I might need to become her dependent one day for medical purposes), then Chase (because he's small and weak, and not likely to become a doctor or join the military - thus of no real value in the long run).

Whew, I'm glad I got that sorted. Now to go sleep like a baby!